When I chase after you
You run even further


Yeah, I have no mood to do whatever. Just start of with today. Got up early, like my previous post said, I slept like only 4hours at most. I can't sleep at all. Washed up & went to use lappy awhile. Few uncles & aunties came over already. Yup, Grandma's birthday. Almost everyone came only like 4-5pm? I went over to SocialLounge to pay for the catering. Slacked with cousins & oh, Dad's back from his trip. Just in time for Grandma's birthday ;) Then we ate dinner & it was super hilarious. Kept crapping with my cousins & so-called suan each other. I eat till very full ah! Crapped more, Esther came down at around 8pm. My Grandma actually invited her! HAHA. Talked to each other about our problems & went to cut cake. Met up with DVD & Zach. DVD, Josh & Black, you three really are good actors. With DVD acting as the "Jason" guy who wants to know Esther. But too bad, you'll never beat me as I'm too pro that I can help Esther find out. HAHA. Anyway, chatted awhile, went to poolside to slack. There's a group of guys at the other end, one was playing guitar. Super nice luh. Eh, he not bad one okay ;D . Not interested though. Then sent Esther back home, I went back to SocialLounge slack abit. Time to clean up & we went back to my place. Relatives all had to go as they have work or school. Used lappy till now. 330am already, I better sleep soon. Sadly, I don't think I can sleep well.

Esther, don't think too much already. We're like almost in the same situation, just abit different. If you really think you can't stand the feeling he's giving you, just talk to him about it already. Like you said, you don't see him as a ideal boyfriend. So don't make yourself so upset already okay? Talk to him & work things out smoothly. If it goes well, make things work. If it doesn't, pretend nothing happened & remain as before. All the best to you. Love ya. & Nice shopping trip at Town! & That freaky retard in the bus! HAHA ;)




I forced myself to smile
So you won't see me cry

31st May
Happy Birthday to Grandma!


Grandma, I wish you good health & many more years to come. You've been doting on me & Zen all the time. Even though there may be quarrells, we still love you deeply. Sorry for making you worry when I don't come home, but don't worry, I will be okay. Love ya!


When can I ever do things right? I made a friend lost his girlf. & I'm making myself lose you. Fuuuuuuuck, can someone just stab me? At least I get to ease the pain in my heart. Okay, I gotta go get ready. Have many things to do this whole day. Relatives are starting to flood my place, time for me to put on a smiling face. Take cares all! Loves & don't worry, I'm fine ;)


It's like everything little thing you do
Puts a smile on my face

Troubles, one after another


Honestly, I'm sick of everything. I feel like screaming so loud that I don't care if I lose my voice. I can't stand crying every night. & Worst, I made a friend lost someone. Wtfuck right? Messages of insulting words keep coming in by someone. "Bitch" "Pathetic" "Fuck you" & so on. Whatever uh, I can't be bothered to reply. I already told her I have no other intentions & I even apologised I don't know for what? In the end she told me it was "all my fault" . I cried, but not for her. For my friend, cos I feel so bad? Only to one side. Ahhh, forget it. Ima talk to someone then see what to do.




^-^

It's 8:16am, just got home.
I'm super tired, shag.
& I'm low in mood.
Damn you Cassy.

Tell yourself to believe.
Tell yourself to trust.
& Hopefully, everything will turn out right.
Off to washup & bed.
Goodbye

Overall, I'm just someone who's not strong


Slept super "early" yesterday. Was playing Audition with some friends. Got super tired, went to bed, but managed to sleep only at 11am as my house was so darn noisy. I don't understand why I can't just have some peace even when I'm sleeping. Forget it. One of my cousin came over today. Ate dinner together & chatted random stuffs. She's an air stewardess! Haha, but it's only for awhile I guess. May meet her next week to go out or something. Again, Audi-ed till now, just went off. I need to get some sleep uh, slept 7hours only. Have to go out with Esther tomorrow ;) Alright, nothing much to update already. Shall end here uh. Byeeeeees <3



I'm trying to pretend that everything's okay.
I'm smiling & being random the whole time.

I want to tell you but those words won't fit.
When can I at least try to accept myself?

Some of you know that I'm not okay.
& Yeah, I'm not, but I'll be fine ;)

Not in the mood


Feeling damn bored now. Waiting for someone's reply since 6pm. Sigh. Anyway, have a video to share people. I was surfing youtube, came across this lol. It's a parody of Wonder Girls - Nobody. Enjoy. & More videos! Uber funny. ;)







Okay uh, I think I'm going back chiong Audition awhile. Bored! Byebai <3

Just got home people! Ima go wash up & go to bed. It's like 7:37am. HAHAHAHA! Alright, will update tomorrow. Byebai ! <3

MEGAN FOX.. A MAN?!

Okay you guys so gotta see this. The leading female role of Transformers, Megan Fox is actually a man! She's a transsexual. It's so shocking lah! But she or rather, he, is still so pretty! ;)

CLICK HERE


Okay nothing much to blog already. Going out later. Ima go get ready! READ THE ARTICLE! Really, I hope it's some celebrity rumour. x.x


I've heard it all before.

Where you are, is where I wanna be
Right next to you & you next to me



Take a little of your time
Watch this video




Woke up super late today. Anyway, Icy darling got a boyf already! He's name's Shawn. & To Shawn, don't bully her uh, or I'll castrate you. Make her cry, Ima let you eat my middle finger. HAHA! Last long you both. (: Okay kinda bored, sigh. Think I'm gonna Audi awhile. Really nothing much to say already. Sigh, guess Ima sleep early, kinda tired. Alright, remember to watch the video! Click on the handsome dog's picture, it'll link you there. ;D Byeeeee <3



Avalanche

All I wanted.



Sigh, to Someone, you can say whatever you want. But it doesn't make any difference to my life. Cos I don't see anything bad that I'm doing. Probably you have to stop being so childish & stop trying to insult me or people by MSN NICKS. Its utterly ridiculous. Really, you can say what you want. But you're like only talking to yourself cos I don't give a shit? I just read what you wrote, I think to myself, "Heh, again" & I carry on with my own stuffs not even thinking about it. You can continue to insult me after reading this but I don't care. & If you say it's your own mind, you can say whatever you want, then I think you have issues. Go consult a doctor, it may help. I've never once said anything bad about you on MSN. I feel, what for? But after what you said, I feel, it's because you're not even worth any words. Oh go ahead be pissed about this. Continue to insult me more. You should try opening a petition of ANTI-CASSY also. Idea right? HAHA. Honestly, I don't feel good writing stuffs about you. But I'm writing stuffs on how I feel about you. I never leaked any of your stuffs. But just stop being a kid, you're 17 soon. Then we're all 17 together. But who's the one having problems with us all the time? You.



How did us friends, turn out to be this way?
We still treat you as a sister.
But do you?

All better


Hey people, I'm all better! ;) I have no fever, no flu, just a slight cough. Haha, thanks those who showed concern! Okay, gonna blog a quick one I guess.

Monday
Got sick, whatever. Edited post.





Faith. Hope. Trust. Love.

Having high fever now.
Will update when I feel better.




I wanna get better real soon!

The heart has reasons
that the mind has no knowledge of.


Random day ;)

Scar-ed


Something happened but I don't & won't say. I'm just stupid. HAHA. No point saying anything as it already happened & it's over.

Went out on Friday with Maple peeps, Weijie, Yongwei, Sebas, Rance, Chris, Yikai, Kenny, Carol & Alison. Met Alison, my cousin, around 8pm & cabbed down to Bugis. Met up with the rest & joined them for steamboat. It was really fun & dinner. Everyone disturbed each other, jokingly quarrell & KENNY STILL OWES ME MARTELL! After dinner, headed to Arcade & as usual, the boys play & play. Headed to Illuma to see if there's any movie. Decided to watch Angels & Demons. It's a really nice show for most. I got every part of it! Carol & Rance couldn't join us though. So left the 8 of us. After movie, we had to exit by stairs. I tripped over the stairs & I sprained abit of my ankle! D; Then walked to Parklane mall for LAN. Wanted to Audi but Alison & Sebas couldn't load it. So me, Alison, Sebas & Weijie played L4D. We tried the new mode, Survivor mode. Kinda hard la, 2 Smokers, 2 Hunters, piangs = = . Then played Campaign. Dc-ed halfway & we headed to CS. Kenny, Yongwei, Yikai & Chris joined us after or between their Dota match. Super funny, I clear team eh! Pro right, HAHA! At 6am, we decided to go home. So me, Alison, Sebas & Weijie shared cab. Once home, washed up & sleep!

Today, did nothing much. Supposingly meeting Troy & Peon. But I was kinda tired also, still sick, having fever & headaches. So didn't went out. Sorry both! Anw, just played Audi, watch Dvd & more Audi with H♥. Waiting for him to be home & Ima sleep ;) . Alright, ending here. Byeeeeee!

Troubled


Sigh, I hate problems man, why my life so problematic want?! Kanasai, can I just press a STOP button, & then REWIND everything back where I was sooooooo happy & problem free. Argh, family problems, friend problems, school problems. & Just when everything seems to be getting better, GUY PROBLEMS. Wahlau I want bang wall already can? I don't want boyf, but I don't want lose those after me? Aiya, I also don't know anything. Tomorrow onwards, LOOOOOONG & TIRING DAYS AHEAD. Okay uh, nights. T.T



If only life was a game.
I would restart my life,
Without a thought.

Memories


Deleted post. Don't want people to get upset & worry again. I'm fine. ;)


Okay enough emo-ing. Very bored ah, did nothing, everyday home, comp, eat, sleep. Zzz. Audi-ed with my Audi Cpl today, but like awhile nia. Then Audi with Troy one round! He went off D; . & With Melting! ;D . He pei-ed me sooooo long lahs. Thanks uh. Then with AHJIE! Omgawd I miss him manzxzxz, like really alot lah! T______T . He called me, then very long never hear his voice sia. Lol. Anyway, time to sleep! Oh, & watch the videos below! HAHA, nights.



HAPPY BIRTHDAY
TO
ESTHER ;)
&
YONGWEI ;)

It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time!


Haha! Just a short update with videos I found. Enjoy!








I couldn't get the link for this. MUST WATCH!
CLICK HERE TO DIRECT TO YOUTUBE

Heavenly Days


Woah, I woke up like 7pm plus today! Super tired, rushed & got ready. Bro came back already! It was super funny when he saw Lexas.

Zen: *Points at Lexas* , "Eh, what happen to him?!" *Laughs* , "Lexas you so cute!" .

LOL, evil right he. Okay, passed Jo some of her stuffs back. Esther came to collect for her. Chatted awhile. I want things to be okay. But I don't know who to trust anymore. Lol. Anyway, super bored now lahs. I want play WoW! WJ's playing WoW already! Weeeeeeeets. I'll be playing back next Monday. Bro's gonna buy me Wrath of the Lich King! Sweet <3 . Okay uh, I go Audi awhile. Loves.



If the mind, keeps thinking you've had enough.
But the heart, keeps telling you don't give up.

I'm somehow better


Hey peeps, somehow better even though nothing's really solved. Still got some stuff haven't even started = = . Anyway, woke up real late. Around 6pm. Saw Dad's message telling me get ready by 7pm to bring Lexas to the vet. He's so poor thing la. The vet says he has a HotSpot. Go google it up. I'll upload the pictures tomorrow. Than he has to wear this cone thing. He looks like a doggy satellite. He just took it off, went to put back for him. He hates it luh. They have to shave his infected part of the fur. It's red & bleeding. Wahlau heart pain. Okay, I kinda bored so I'm gonna up load a picture of the make up I'm using, price, etc. I know, LAMEEEEE. But girls are into make up what. So for my friends, this are highly recommended! All for Normal to Oily/sensitive skin. But first, for me I don't have any reactions after using them. But everyone's skin is different, so if you break out or so, don't hoot me ah! =x




1. Chanel Eyeliner White; $32
* Very easy to apply on & remove. ;D

2. MAC Prep+Prime Make-up Base; $39
* After applying, your skin feels 80% smoother.
* Putting on your make up is much easier!

3. Dior Waterproof Eyeliner Black; $32
* Comes with smudge sponge & sharperner.
* Long lasting.

4. Maybelline Angelfit 2-Way Foundation; Below $30 & around $16 for Refill
* For me I use with Angelfit Liquid Foundation, but use just abit!
* If your skin is perfect, can just apply w/o anything.
* If your skin has scars of acne, use with concealer or Liquid.
* So far my skin is okay with it, but I wanna change to Pur Minerals. Cannot buy in Singapore! D:

5. Maybelline Cat Eyes Mascarra; Below $30
* Use after curling your lashes.
* Your lashes will really stand out if applied properly.

6. MAC StudioFix concealer; $27
* Just a little dap & it covers your scars, dark circles, etc.
* Easy to apply & long lasting.

7. Dior 5 Couleurs Eye-shadow; $86 or $90+, below $100.
- It's my Mum's & I'm sharing it with her.
* If you like exploring your eyes, buy this & do wonders with it! ;D


For Toner & Moisturizer, I'm using MAC light Toner & ZA Moisturizer. Make up remover I'm using MAC & Cleanser I'm user Avene (Recommended for sensitive skin!) . I'll get the details & post on the next update. Hope it helps some of you. Many loves!

Fuck this year


Friend
You said I was bothering you, your boyf & family. Why not know the truth then insult me? Your mum was worried so I helped to find you. & I knew you were at your boyf's house so I called him. & I was so right. But I didn't call back to your house as it was late. I called your boyf to tell him to tell you that I want go pass your stuff back to you at your house, he couldn't really tell you so I had to try to get you on the phone. You guys made me wait so I waited, then you hanged my call. I called back, no one answered. Next day, your mum came down my house to pass my dad something. My dad wasn't home so I had to entertain her. She asked to come in I said sure. Then she just told me pass a message to my dad. As I send her out, she asked what happened to me & you. I told her I don't know as I didn't want your mum to know. But she insisted, I just said, "Misunderstanding over make up I THINK" . I didn't said it was the main reason. Today I asked if you were going school tomorrow, you ignored me. But when people talk to you, you replied them. My mum asked me to call her just now. I wondered why. She told me she talked to you. I was like what the fuck? I even asked her why did she call. She ignored me & told me she tried talking to you awhile. She said you told her you had your reasons for not saying or something like that. You said I was bothering you. & Said I threatened to kill myself? I thought I only said, "I don't feel like living anymore". Not, "Goodbye, I'm gonna die" . You're my friend. Not my lover. Then at a point she was fed up. So she just asked if you were willing to give up the friendship. You said, "Maybe" . Then she hanged your call, she was too disappointed. She told me she wasn't angry with you. But sad & disappointed. When I knew this, I cracked. At the last line, I cracked. I held back my tears. What's the point of our friendship? What did you actually treated me as? For me, I've always treated you as my real sister. We were even closer than that. People who don't know us say stuffs about us. Yet we helped each other. We knew each other inside out. But I guess only till that extend. I don't know what you're thinking anymore. I've been giving in over & over again. I've never once said, "Fuck off, you're irritating" . Cos I've never felt like this about you before. After what happened, I could have go around getting sympathy like some people we know does. But what's the point? You're my friend, my sister. You know I'd never do anything to hurt you intentionally.

I don't know our problem is now. You refuse to tell anyone, refuse to solve it. I wonder, are you just using that as an excuse to end the friendship? Or did I did something to made you so upset & pissed till that extend that you refuse to tell anyone? There're so many options & I don't know which is true & which is not. I'm not even angry with you till now. But I've reached that point where I can no longer say anything to try to explain to you as you won't listen. You said you wanna be left alone. Yeah, I'll fuck out of your life. Thats what you want. I remember five of us, slacking at 71 just doing random stuff. After sometime, it became to me & you. We did everything together. We tried many new things. Sharing make up, sharing clothes, bags, slippers, laptops, youtube videos, everything. But now you suddenlly said you may give up the friendship. I really don't know what to think or do anymore. Maybe, we really need some alone time. I don't know how long. But I just wish, that we'll be okay & get back to old times, hopefully with the other three too. Sigh, for now, this is where I'll stop.

People, don't push the blame here & there. We both have faults in this. Probably you guys don't understand, but no one is 100% at fault. Please, thanks.

Thanks BENJAMIN, Jonathan & Kenny for cheering me up.
Thanks Esther for helping us but I guess for now there's no point.
Sora bro, we may soon not be friends anymore, but we still love you for sure!
& Thanks everyone who cared, I'll get better.
& to Boyf, sorry but I may have to let us go. ):



You walked away from the one person
who never left your side.

Boring boring boring


Guess what I've been doing? Playing The Sims 2. How pathetic right? LOL. Totally nothing better else to do. It's like 5:10am & I'm still up playing! Rofl, Bro going Cambodia soon ler, think he's at Airport now. Some school stuff. Take care okay! Anyway, no nothing's been settled. I also don't know why, very hard meh? Lol. I feel like saying lots of stuffs. But uh, I'm not so bad till that extend, so.. whatever. HAHA.

Jonathan, Metal sucks okay! & Enjoy your now life in Army ^^ .

Uhh, really nothing to update.
Bye.