To drown in my tears


I never wanted to update. But suddenlly, I'm getting alot of problems. I feel vexed, stress & always wanting to cry. The least I want is a quarrell from a best friend. My best sister. I don't wanna elaborate. & This bloody school of mine, suddenlly come tell me switch places? From Dhoby to Bukit Merah. It takes even further for us to get to school lah. Fuck you man. Then my family, how to make them happy if I'm like this? My relationship, we're hitting a month this Thursday. But I don't feel happy at all. Baby, I really don't wish to hurt you. Whatever I say, however I explain, you'll never understand. You keep asking & asking & gets me damn fed up & pissed. I sometimes just wanna off my phone. I don't know how to work this relationship anymore. & Yeah, I guess I'm giving up. I don't wanna fall back into depression but I feel so damn hurt. & The worst thing is, I don't know why. Now, I really wished I would die. I do things without knowing that I'm doing it. I say things that would hurt people. Hurt people who love me, people who care.

I can't turn to anyone now. I wanna turn to Jo. But we're kinda having abit of problems. Who else can I turn to? Turn to boyf, he only ask me relax relax & it won't help. I can't turn to my parents or brother. Now only, I'm telling Kenny everything. If he really can't help, I really don't know who else to turn to already. Everything's fucking me up. I became so weak, so fragile. & Really, I don't know why, life's fucking me up.

Goodbye.